Can you easily and quickly bring romance back into your relationship? Many people provide simple solutions to a complex situation. There are many possible reasons for romance to fade away – and sometimes rather quickly.
- You or your partner has a history of trauma, physical or mental abuse and the affereffects are resurfacing
- You chose this partner on the rebound when you had broken up with someone else who you really loved
- Your love styles do not match and one pushes for intimacy (sexual or emotional) while the other pulls away
- You feel disappointed, hurt, betrayed, angry, frustrated at work, with your partner or with your life and lifestyle
- Etc., etc., etc.
The first step is to examine what could be the real cause of the decline in romance with your partner. If the love is still there and still strong, and neither of you wants to break up, then here are some suggestions for tactics that can bring both of you back into a romantic state of mind.
“Every couple experiences ups and downs in their relationship. And when you’ve been with the same person for many years, it’s inevitable that the excitement will subside and you’ll be intimate less frequently. The worst thing you can do about this, is to assume that there’s nothing that can be done. There are plenty of ways to bring romance back into a long-term relationship. You just have to make a few small changes. Here are some tips to reignite your love life.
1. Take notice of your partner
When we know someone so intimately it’s easy to forget to ask about simple things like how their day was. Even if there’s nothing important to say, it’s still vital to share everyday things like this. It’s all about showing your partner that you care.
2. Go on a couples retreat
Why not book a weekend retreat at a spa and wellness centre, such as Japanese Mountain Retreat. A change in surroundings can really set the scene for romance.
3. Don’t rely on gifts
While every girl loves flowers and chocolate, if the only time they receive these gifts is in apology for doing something wrong, the relationship becomes transactional. By giving her these items, you’re shutting down any opportunity to address the real issue by talking about it. The next time you frustrate your partner, gift them your attention and save the flowers and chocolate for when they’ll really be a surprise.
4. Touch each other
Physical contact is the best way to show intimacy. Simply holding your partner’s hand, playing with her hair or resting your hand on her leg will tell her that you enjoy her company. Just don’t create the expectation that every time you touch her it should lead to sex.
5. Go on a date
Dates shouldn’t only be on special occasions. Go out more often and you’ll find the change in surroundings adds excitement and makes it much easier to talk. It doesn’t have to be somewhere expensive, just somewhere you haven’t been a thousand times before.
6. Surprise your partner
Planning and organisation is the enemy of romance, to set your partner off, you need to bring some spontaneity back into your relationship. Surprise your loved one with tickets to a show or take her on a picnic.
7. Take time apart
This may sound counterintuitive, but sometimes time apart is the healthiest way to rekindle a relationship. Give your partner the space to satisfy their hobbies and pass-times and after time apart, they won’t be able to wait until they’re back in your arms.”
Ivy Delfin is a blogger who loves to help people with relationship advice. She works in marketing for a tourism company.