Are you trying to be “perfect” at work, with your family, and in love? Many of us believe we have to do “it,” whatever “it” is, perfectly. And if we do something wrong, something incorrectly, something that doesn’t work out as well as we had planned or expected, then we feel like a “perfect failure” or “perfectly imperfect.”

If you believe you are a perfect failure at work, with your family, with love, or with anything else in your life, what do you think would be your next step? Would you decide to:

* Give up and quit?
* Keep attempting to prove to everyone, including yourself,
that you’re not such a perfect failure – even though you may
have already programmed your subconscious to believe you are
a failure?
* Begin proving to yourself and everyone else that you are, in
fact a perfect failure by purposely and consciously being and
behaving in ways to insure that you will fail?

I just finished a Rubenfeld Synergy mind-body therapy session with a client whose modus operandi, learned in his early childhood, was that he had to be “perfect.” So, as he lay on the table, relaxed, meditative and contemplating how “being perfect” has affected his life, I asked him “What is the opposite of ‘being perfect’? His answer provided the clue to transforming his consciousness.

To this client, the opposite of “being perfect” is being “imperfect” or disorganized. So, if you believe that if you are not perfect, you are therefore imperfect, disorganized and whatever you are focused on will fall apart, how can you ever stop trying to be “perfect?”

Working with this client, I asked him if there is another way for him to describe a state of not being perfect. Finally, after some thought, he said, “I can be balanced.” And I added to that statement, “I can be balanced with ease.”

Now which would you rather be: “perfect,” “perfectly imperfect” or a “perfect failure,” or “balanced with ease” – at work, with your family, in your intimate love relationship, and anywhere else in your life? Please comment below and let me know what you think.

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