Love in the Blizzard of Life – Day 30 – FLOW

Love in the Blizzard of Life - Creativity

I have discovered, for myself, that taking on a challenge gets my psychic and physical energy flowing and aligned. In other words, it puts me into the FLOW.  After 30 days of writing blog posts daily, I want to leave you with the most important aspect of any activity in your life.  If you are operating within this system, everything else seems to fall into place.  When you are in the FLOW, life is beautiful, every moment is an adventure to cherish, and every person is a symbol of God’s love.

Young children naturally function within the FLOW of their everyday activities.  When they get involved in an activity, they are totally present until something distracts them and then they become totally involved in a new activity.  When we are in the FLOW, time moves slowly and we are not impatient.  When we are in the FLOW of love, we are happy to allow the love to build, we enjoy the nuances of our shared experience and we express all those other wonderful qualities I have been talking about for 29 days.  When we are in relationship FLOW, each of us feels accepted, understood, appreciated, acknowledged, trusted and desired.  There is no craving or longing for something outside the relationship because we are able to express our full self and feel all of our feelings.

You may have a strong INCENTIVE, INTENTION,  PRESENT MOMENT awareness, DRIVE,  inner ARCHITECT,  PATIENCE, ability to SURRENDER,  COMMITMENT, TRUST, DISCERNMENT, PASSION, DESIRE,  CREATIVITY,  SENSUALITY, SEXUAL EXPRESSION, COMPASSION, and  COMMUNICATION. You PRACTICE relationships skills, you balance TOGETHERNESS and AUTONOMY,  your SENSITIVITY. UNDERSTANDING, RECEPTIVITY, FORGIVENESS, ACCEPTANCE, and EMPATHY may be flourishing.  You may know the PURPOSE for your relationship and your life MISSION. You may even have a sense of MASTERY of your relationships and your life.  If you have developed all of the above skills to an adequate (not perfect) level, then you will easily and often find yourself living in the FLOW, loving your life and loving your relationships.

Today’s question is:  How often and how easily do you find yourself living and loving in the FLOW?

  • Are you able to roll with the punches, take the path of least resistance, and enjoy drifting along within your relationships?
  • Can you set the course, ask for what you want, encourage others to express their needs and then creatively rise above the tide?
  • When you feel a surge of fear, discomfort, emotional uncertainty, disappointment even boredom, can you stay the course, ride the wave, and continue to more forward within your relationships?

Ask yourself NOW: Can I stay in the FLOW when I encounter the ups and downs and ins and outs of loving relationships in my life?

Being in the FLOW is what allows works of art to be created.  Being in the FLOW leads to marriage, business development, and success at all levels of human being.  Relationships are a work of art in progress.  The instrument through which we create this masterpiece is LOVE.   With interest, determination, study and practice we CAN develop all the necessary skills and emotional overtones to build exquisite relationships filled with love.  Are YOU ready to develop MASTERY and get into the FLOW?


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Dr. Erica






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30 thoughts on “Love in the Blizzard of Life – Day 30 – FLOW

  1. I must admit I am not ‘in the flow’ as often as I would like to be.. But it sure feels great when I am! I am working on being able to be in the flow more. Cause as i said it sure feels great!! So many things can distract one from that flow.

    • Holly,

      Getting in the FLOW is a sign that you are on the right track in your life and your energy is aligned. We can get out of the flow when we are “trying” to do something and pushing instead of allowing.


      Dr. Erica

  2. Hi Dr. Erica:

    I am learning to live in the flow and it is a wonderful thing! My journey began around 6 years ago when I went on a medical leave. It forced me to reevaluate a lot of things in my life and I have learned so much on this journey. I know I still have a long way to go but I know that I have come a long way already. 🙂


    • Kevin,

      It can take a big change in your life to finally teach you to let go of trying so hard and resisting the way things are. Glad to hear you have discovered what it takes to get into the flow.


      Dr. Erica

    • Sarah,

      With young children, being in the FLOW requires including them as part of the process, expecting that you will be interrupted and planning your time that way. They are such a beautiful gift. And your work is also getting done over time.


      Dr. Erica

  3. This I have seen my nephew Dr. Erica 🙂
    “Young children naturally function within the FLOW of their everyday activities. When they get involved in an activity, they are totally present until something distracts them and then they become totally involved in a new activity.”

    He can be quite fixed on it things in that way. Speaking for myself I get in the flow of things when I am working and time runs away with me… I got a timer because I am not good at clock watching!

    • Sadie-Michaela,

      That is why I feel so happy when I am involved in a project, I get into the FLOW. I become focused, time doesn’t exist for awhile and I usually have no problem continuing to focus until the task is completed. However, getting started can be difficult as well as handling so many other tasks of daily living.


      Dr. Erica

  4. Congrats on your 30 day challenge! Challenging ourselves is something that can make a difference as you have stated, I may just have to follow in your footsteps and put this into my marketing plan. I do try to blog consistently but never really committed to a challenge. I can see that it has worked for you.. Taking action and making things happen. Thanks for sharing. Chery 🙂

    • Chery,

      I seem to work well within a challenge and 30 days is a good amount of time. About a year ago, I completed a challenge for, writing 100 articles in 100 days. That became a bit too burdonsome and began to feel like an obligation. But I pushed through. Even the 30 day blog challenge became a little more difficult at about the 15th day. That is when the “grit” has to take over and I just keep doing it no matter how I feel. I completed my novel – Love in the Blizzard of Life – in a 30 day writing challenge. And now I am in a year long challenge – to walk 365 miles in a year. That has pushed me to get to the gym (or my beach path) and just do it.


      Dr. Erica

      • I just wanted to say thanks for the story here. Good for you 365 miles in a year seems like a lot to me, I have a path in my back yard that I walk in the summer months, I think it is about a mile and a half I do try to walk this everyday when it is nice out of course. I also am going to work on a challenge for myself, I havent figured it ut yet but I have been thinking about it since I read your blog post last week. You are a true inspiration. Thanks again Chery 🙂

  5. To me living in the FLOW is allowing life to unfold just as it should. The bumps are going to come, we can count on that. It’s how we react to the bumps that either keeps us in the FLOW or pops us out of it. I think being in the FLOW involves giving of yourself to others. I picture it as circular with us both taking thing in and giving them out.

    We’ve all been there, present, enthusiastic, loving, balanced and joyful. Be mindful of when it happens so you know the feeling and can return on command.

    Thanks, Dr. Erica. Very goose-bumpy post.


    • Rick,

      I love what you added “Be mindful of when it happens so you know the feeling and can return on command.” I certainly could have used that a few days when I felt overwhelmed (by lots of good things and a lot to do) and out of the flow. There is a term for feeling stressed when good things are happening – Eustress – yet that can still bring you out of the FLOW.


      Dr. Erica

  6. Dr. Erica,
    I have read most of your last month articles and I must say all of them were very touching for me… but this one, is even more.. because I learn about Love and the balanced Flow of life about 15 years a go or around that time.. and every day I practice as best as I possible can… many times I have the privilege to see and fel the flow in everything and everyone around me and sometime not.. BUT I focus mostly on the Balanced Flow and that make me feel better no matter what.

    Life is as it is… it is what we make out of it and plus, it is what we MADE of it way before we come to understand all this (I know you may agree with this as well) and knowing that fact… we can only be grateful that we are where we are and who we are and what we know to make life a little better as we go along our journey home.

    Thanks so much for sharing so much wisdom, and very useful information for all of us to benefit and I know you did and love it.
    Thanks again.

    • Nick,

      You continue to amaze me with your heartfelt wisdom that you share so freely. Life just “is” and we have to stop resisting what is and start enjoying each precious moment. We take so much for granted until something unexpected happens. When I am open and aware, just the right people and circumstances appear when I am ready. Life is actually quite an adventure of self-discovery and emotional acceptance.


      Dr. Erica

  7. Dr. Erica,

    First of all, I want to congratulate you on 30 blog posts in 30 days! That is truly an amazing feat! It’s a huge accomplishment now matter how you look at it. And the quality of all your posts in the last 30 days are all top-notch — that’s part of what makes it so amazing!

    As for being in the flow. There are times when I am working on a WordPress website for a client and when my buzzer goes off reminding me to take a 10 minute break, I just just hit the buzzer and keep going for another 45 to 60 minutes because I am so engrossed in what I am doing and enjoying it at the same time that I do NOT want to stop.

    And having FLOW in life is important as well. As an entrepreneur who believes that what I am doing is changing people’s lives, that helps me to stay focused and stay the course and stay in the FLOW!

    Thanks for 30 days of great articles!

    ~ Jupiter Jim

    • Jupiter Jim,

      I really appreciate your kind words and support. Your videos offer all of us so much assistance in this sometimes confusing and frustrating digital world. For me, writing comes easy but the technology sometimes stumps me and certainly takes me out of the flow until I have it figured out.


      Dr. Erica

  8. Living in the FLOW sounds a lot like living in the NOW, doesn’t it? Or maybe it’s just a lot easier to live in the now when we’re in the flow. I’m grateful for the times in my life when I have been in that place, and I look forward to being there again soon.


  9. Life doesn’t always introduce you to the people you want to meet. Sometimes life puts you in touch with the people you need to meet – to help you, to hurt you, to leave you, to love you, and to gradually strengthen you into the person you were meant to become.

  10. Erica, I love your statement, “Relationships are a work of art in progress.” They certainly are. I think that this applies just as much to our relationship with self as it does to our relationships with our significants and others in our lives. I can appreciate how FLOW makes it all possible. It certainly does for me – I experience that feeling and it IS a feeling like no other. It’s a fantastic sense of freedom and peace.

    Great post, Erica.

    Dena Lynn

    • Dena-Lynn,

      You are so right. Our relationship to our own self is also in a continual state of creation. And we don’t always realize that we have choices. The choices we make today affect how we will feel about our self at a future date. So the time to begin creating what we truly want, following our passion and being true to our self, is NOW.


      Dr. Erica

  11. I love challenges and have always been a competitive person. For a short time a few years back, I was in a rut and was not motivated. After a time, I got tired of being in that rut and started to challenge myself. Of course, I did those challenges in baby steps, but my confidence and energy grew. Now I am continually challenging myself and have not fallen into any ruts anymore.

    • Nile,
      I personally work well with time-limited challenges, especially 30 days. I can consistently do something, produce something, every day for a set period of time. But to keep doing it every day, indefinitely, can become rigid and interfere with the spontaneity of life. I am planning to set up a 30 day Relationship Healing Challenge in a few weeks.


      Dr. Erica

  12. Hey Erica,

    I recently took Stephen’s quizes on his site and found out I am dominate (59%) with some influence (29%). Probably a weird mix but it means I simply rise up to the occasion, but also observe stuff very well. It makes perfect sense because when I feel challenged at something I always excel. For instance, if my back is up against the wall I feel at ease. Been doing it since I was young.

    I have read a number of stress management books. Basically, one tactic I learned when you feel overwhelmed is to just close your eyes and watch the thoughts go by. Not judging any of them, just observing.


    • Garen,

      I seem to also do well with challenges and deadlines and seemingly too much to do in a short period of time. I do some of my best work that way because there is no time to think, I just get going and get into the FLOW.

      Stephen’s quizes are intriguing. I will have to check them out.


      Dr. Erica

  13. I think being and staying in the flow is mostly about passion.

    You’ll find it easy to be in the flow with just about anything if everything is going smoothly and you are benefiting greatly from it.

    But when obstacles arise (as they always do), or you just hit dry and empty spells (and you will), it is your passion for what you’re doing that will keep you in the flow, or quickly reset the flow button if you’ve been derailed.

    When the passion is absent, you’re likely to use those tough times as convenient and even welcome excuses for throwing in the towel, and totally jumping to a new path altogether.

    • David,

      You have explained the process quite well. Flow is a state that evolves when we are truly focused on and living our passion. And it is true that when our passion is not there, we can easily lose interest in whatever we are doing or keep attempting to do it as the agitation builds within.


      Dr. Erica

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