The Inner Game of Love
Love emanates from within us and moves outward toward others. Watch the sweet endearing gaze of a baby, inspiring tenderness and love from everyone who sees those big innocent eyes. Babies need to receive attention and nurturing from outside to sustain life, but the love just naturally emanates from within. They don’t have to be taught how to be loving and endearing. Love oozes out of them, easily and effortlessly.
It turns out that not only love but everything we think and do, believe and experience, emanates from within us. Two people growing up in the same home often create entirely different life experiences and look back on very different childhood memories. Each person has a unique and separate memory of the exact same life events.
As we grow and develop skills, life skills, sports abilities, intellectual and emotional competencies, and the capacity for love, we forget how much of our outer experience begins within us. Yes, other people may behave in ways that are intrusive, unfair and downright abusive. But we can decide how to respond and how we are going to feel. We can accept what we cannot change at the moment and we can visualize what we want and intend to have in our future. And then, seemingly without much effort, the present situation seems to melt away and we are able to enter our promised land.
- Do you believe that love is an inner game or do you still think it comes from the outside?
- Do you believe that some people have been given certain gifts and it is easy for them but difficult or impossible for you?
- Do you believe that life happens from the inside out or from the outside in?
Need a love boost from a caring, compassionate, loving coach and mentor who understands the pain and joy of love?
Here’s to living your life in love.
Warmly,
Dr. Erica
July 19th, 2012 at 12:39 am
I, too, believe all love starts within the inner realm of who we are. This natural spirit tendency is already present. It can be nurtured, abused, hurt, abandoned, but never destroyed. It’s an energy that pervades every cell of our being. While love may be hard to see or feel in some people, it is only because something caused them to close it off. The layers of “stuff” we pile on only hide our true nature. Seeing people for who they really are (love), instead of who we think they are, can solve many problems in the world. Thank you for a great post.
Charlene Christiano recently posted..By: Charlene
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Dr. Goodstone Reply:
July 19th, 2012 at 12:43 am
Charlene,
What a beautiful response. Few people truly grasp the realization that we are all love because that loving nature may be hidden beneath layers of defenses, resistance, and unloving attitudes. I cam always surprised by people who study, and may have studied for years, religious or spiritual teachings and yet they remain judgmental, resentful, angry, untrusting and often behave in unloving ways. Love is not just in thought, it is in belief and attitude and action.
Warmly,
Dr. Erica
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July 23rd, 2012 at 1:53 pm
So much gets in the way of remembering to love yourself first. There are bills to pay, futures to create, things to do, people to see. The hectic pace at which we operate today leaves little time for that necessary self-reflection.
All feelings originate from within. Even those feelings that we think come from outside influence actually cause reactions from within, reactions we have full control over.
When we strip away all of the other feelings, self-thought and inner conversations all that we can be left with is love. We are simply awareness, will and love.
In Clarity, Focus and Action,
RICK
Rick Lelchuk recently posted..Relationship Building and Marketing Hype
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Dr. Erica Goodstone Reply:
July 23rd, 2012 at 3:26 pm
Rick,
Although love comes from within us, it does help to have other people remind us that we are lovable. A smile, a kind word, a gesture of caring can help us to reconnect to that inner feeling that is essential for happiness and creation.
Warmly,
Dr. Erica
Dr. Erica Goodstone recently posted..The Inner Game of Love
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July 24th, 2012 at 6:08 pm
I do believe in the power of our thoughts and feelings to guide us, not only in love but in all things we do. In fact this is precisely why I advocate cultivating the skill of self-motivation. Like your point about two people growing up in the same household but having different memories of that experience, the power of self-motivation is why two people can attend the same motivational seminar and one immediately takes action and the other does nothing.
marquita herald recently posted..Making a Difference: Kids Solving Real World Problems
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Dr. Erica Goodstone Reply:
July 24th, 2012 at 7:32 pm
Marquita,
I am often amazed at the number of people who take motivational seminars or read spiritual and loving books, and then do not act on what they have observed and studied and learned.
The inner game supercedes all outer games – in sports, in relationships and all aspects of life.
Warmly,
Dr. Erica
Dr. Erica Goodstone recently posted..The Inner Game of Love
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July 31st, 2012 at 2:29 am
It all seems to start from the inside out, whether it be love, confidence, joy, success. We always hear we are what we think about all day long. I think some are programed better than others. Some seem to emerge from the womb laughing about life. Others struggle more to see the positive things and blessings. But no matter who we are, with the power of autosuggestion, affirmations and faith, I believe we can overcome negativity in our lives and learn to love, laugh and enjoy life.
Thank you Dr. Erica….I appreciate you!
Lynn
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Dr. Erica Goodstone Reply:
July 31st, 2012 at 2:48 pm
Lynn,
I have also found that our expectations have a huge effect. If we expect everything to go smoothly, if we expect others to behave and respond in a certain way, we are sure to be disappointed. But if we allow the world to unfold around us and we handle whatever comes to us with equanimity, we can more easily access that calm, neutral place inside and create abundance from there.
Warmly,
Dr. Erica
Dr. Erica Goodstone recently posted..The Inner Game of Love
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August 7th, 2012 at 6:13 pm
Hi Erica, I believe that love must come from the inside out. We cannot look to others to make us feel loved. We are love simply because we exist. We don’t need to prove anything. You cannot give what you don’t have. You must love yourself first. It’s okay to put yourself first. It’s not being selfish. Being selfish is putting yourself last on your to-do list. When I work with my clients, the very first thing we work on is self-love. Without that, no one can get very far in life or in business. Thanks for sharing your wisdom!
Sheree Diamond, The Flow Doctor
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Dr. Goodstone Reply:
August 13th, 2012 at 2:11 am
Sheree,
There is nothing we can teach that is more powerful than self love. When we have that, the world opens up to us and we are truly capable of loving others with an open heart.
Warmly,
Dr. Erica
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February 26th, 2013 at 9:36 pm
Hi Dr. Erica,
thank you for your inspiring post!
Love for me is an inner game, when we love and accept ourselves we then can love and accept others.
If we grew up with little love and lots of put-downs we may need to reparent ourselves for a while before we can give and receive love.
Love and Light
Yorinda
Yorinda recently posted..Loving Kindness Prayer
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Dr. Erica Goodstone Reply:
February 26th, 2013 at 10:53 pm
Yorinda,
So many of us are struggling and striving to “get” love from someone or something outside of our own self. But it all begins inside. Love is an inside job and then we see the reflection on the outside.
Warmly,
Dr. Erica
Dr. Erica Goodstone recently posted..Love in the Blizzard of Life – Day 30 – FLOW
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